Broken Mug

……

Raito-san, you should rest. You just gave Nayuki-kun a really significant blood transfusion, so…

This hospital offers cutting-edge treatment. I promise, he’ll be okay.

Fortunately, the knife did not not damage any of his internal organs. The doctor stated that his injury is not fatal.

It’ll be fine, Raito. You should get some sleep.

…I’m sorry, I can’t. I need to stay with him. It’s my fault he’s here…

Raito-san…

If I had just dodged… I’m so sorry. I don’t feel like talking anymore.

…That’s okay. Please, take care of yourself.

……

*sigh…*

(I can’t believe this happened… I heard he survived, but…)

(I bought Raito-san a bento, but I’m not sure if he’ll actually eat it.)

(Wait, there’s someone outside the door. Is that…?)

…God, what do I do?

(Chihiro? He looks pretty upset. Should I say something? We haven’t really been talking as of late…)

……

(No, I can’t just leave him alone in this state.)

…Chihiro. Are you okay?

Taotao…

(This is awkward… But he looks like he’s about to cry…)

…I got some flowers. Are these okay?

In what way?

Like, the flower language…

(Chihiro… He’s such a good guy.)

Did you…buy those for Nayuki-san?

…I thought that he’d be really happy to see flowers when he wakes up. I dunno when he will, so I got potted ones…

Aren’t potted flowers bad luck for inpatients…?¹

A-Are they…?! Th-Then I need to go buy different ones…

It’s alright, I don’t think people believe that anymore in this era.

This era?

I’m sure Nayuki-san would be happy no matter what kind of flowers you gave him. I got something for Raito-san, so do you wanna go in together?

…O-Okay.

Raito-san looked exhausted. He just had that blood transfusion done, but he’s not resting… I’m worried about him.

Yeah. I hope Nayuuki wakes up soon… It was probably really scary for him…

…You were scared too, right? Are you doing okay?

……

Taotao, I’m… I’m sorry.

Huh…?

I’ve been really mean to you… I kept saying awful things, even though I didn’t want to… And I was really selfish, even though I knew I shouldn’t have been…

I’m really, really sorry.

I got scared because I thought Nayuuki was gonna die, so I… I wanted you by my side…

But I’ve been such an awful person to you that I didn’t wanna ask for something so selfish. But I really…regret that.

It’s… It’s all my fault. I’m so sorry…

…Chihiro.

Y-You don’t have to forgive me. I just wanna…talk to you again…

Um… I have to forgive you if we wanna talk again.

*gasp*

And I’m not mad. I’ve never been.

Huh…? W-Why not? I was being…so mean…

Yeah, but…

But what…?

Hmm… You know about my little brother, right? He acted kinda like you did when he was younger…

You just reminded me of him, so I wasn’t really all that mad.

…H-How old is your brother?

Five years younger than me.

Then he’s seven years younger than me! Are you saying that I reminded you of a little kid?!

Ahaha, it’s not a bad thing. I find it pretty cute.

……

My parents believed I was the child of God, so they never really paid attention to my little brother. Like, they neglected him.

So I felt like I had to be the one to take care of him. I looked after him. And eventually, he started making these silly little selfish requests…

It surprised me at first, but I realized that it was just his way of testing if I really loved him. So I wanted to reassure him that I did…

*gasp*

…Ugh!

Huh? W-What’s up?

So you knew how Chii felt this entire time? God, that’s so embarrassing…

Well… I think it’s a pretty normal feeling to have. You were neglected by your parents too, right?

Uuurgh…

H-How are you so mature…? That’s not fair…

What? I didn’t realize that was a problem…

…Sorry. This is just so embarrassing.

You acted pretty normal towards me when we first met, so I was confused on why you changed all of a sudden. I was just kinda sitting there, not knowing what to do.

Well it’s because…you talked about your old best friend. So I got…

……

Hm?

…I got jealous.

…!

You’re my best friend, so knowing that I’m not yours was just…

And then, like… I knew that I shouldn’t have, but I started acting selfish and speaking without thinking…

I felt reassured when you did what I told you to because…I knew it meant that you were still willing to be friends with me. Chii’s just like your little brother.

Taotao, you were right. My parents don’t really love me.

So I took advantage of your kindness…

Chihiro…

…My mom would compliment my dancing when she was in a good mood. But she would always talk about how I looked just like my dad, who left us…

So she hated me.

…I’ve always felt this hole inside my heart…

If everyone’s heart has a shape, then mine is like a mug with a big hole on the bottom…

Now that I’m an idol, lots of people love me, but…all of it spills out from the bottom of the mug.

I’m just really greedy. I keep wanting more and more, even though I already get so much.

I became friends with you, and you were so nice to me, but…it wasn’t enough.

I’ve always known this, but…that hole on the bottom of my mug just can’t be fixed.

…And because I’m like this, I hate myself more than anyone else.

…I see.

……

…So how can the mug be fixed? Could I do it?

*gasp*

W-Will you really…?

If you can’t do it yourself, I’ll do everything I can to help.

……

H-How are you so nice all of the time?

…Because I consider you my best friend too.

…Really?

I can’t lie about something this embarrassing.

So is there anything you want right now? Come on, hit me.

Oh, but no errand-running.

…I-I’m not gonna do that anymore.

If you’re okay with anything, then… I wanna know what you’ve been hiding.

*gasp*

You have a secret, right…? You tend to avoid some topics, so…

But I know that you don’t like lying, so I figured that I shouldn’t ask you about it.

But if it helps get a weight off your shoulders, I… I’d like to…know…

Haha, guess the cat’s outta the bag. Makes sense, I suck at covering things up.

…I don’t think anyone else noticed. I just… I’m your closest friend, so…

I can talk about it. It’s been pretty hard to keep it to myself anyway.

But, just a warning, it might sound unbelievable. Are you still up for it?

…I…think I’ll believe you…

…Let’s go somewhere else.