This is Love

…Chief, I’m so sorry.

I heard from Nayuki-kun that you’re on an apology marathon. It’s okay, you don’t have to bow.

I’m just glad that Nayuki-kun’s alright now.

True… But I can’t take back what I said on that livestream.

And after that, an assault occurred onstage… I think I really hurt our fans.

…I’m not sure if anyone will ever fully forgive me, but, as Ev3ns’ leader, I have to do everything I can to earn back everyone’s trust.

*gasp* Then are you going to stay in Ev3ns?

Of course…! I hope you’ll let me stay. Facing Ev3ns head on is my highest priority right now.

I want to face everyone with honesty… Not just the members, but our fans too.

I’ve never done this before, so I might be a bit awkward at the start, but…

We can’t go back the way we are right now. There are problems we have to solve. Until those are cleared, I won’t be able to come up with our tour concept.

…Are you talking about Kuguri-san?

…I am.

Kafka’s been looking for him too, but…there hasn’t been any progress in the search.

His microchip that was implanted before you all went on parole was removed, so…I’m a little worried that his prison sentence will be extended.

I’ll make sure to bring him back. I’ve been using all of my connections to find him.

But even if you do manage to find him… He doesn’t tend to listen. I’m not sure if he’ll come back.

Do you have any ideas for that, Raito-san?

Hm… Well…

I’ve actually been practicing the piano for that very reason.

Huh…? The piano?

(What’s he planning? Well…I’ll put my trust in him.)

(He was a bystander to Chihiro-kun and Tao-kun’s conflict, but now he’s actually making the first move.)

I…remember the first time we had a conversation up here. Um… About your inability to fall in love with people.

Yeah… I forgot about that.

I wasn’t sure what to say back then, so I’ve been thinking about what I should’ve said this entire time…

I feel like you’ve given up on things. Like, your lifespan, and the idea that you can’t love anyone.

……

And maybe that’s why you avoid getting close to the members. You told them about your death prophecy, but maybe you thought that…they’d forget about it eventually.

Well… That’s just the kind of person I used to be. I distanced myself from others and never considered their feelings…

I think there’s more to it than that.

I…feel like there was a part of you that wanted things to be like that.

…I wanted things to be like that?

You wanted people to forget about you. You hoped that nobody would love you.

Because you didn’t want people to…be sad when you died.

……

You said that you feel guilty when someone loves you, right? I think the source of that feeling isn’t just because you can’t love them back, but also because you know they’ll grieve over you one day.

…I’m not sure if that’s true. I feel like I just wanted to protect myself more than anything.

But you were really struggling when Nayuki-kun got hurt.

You love him, don’t you?

……

Yeah. I feel like I do… I’ve always looked after him…

And you do that because you love him.

Romantic love isn’t the only form of love. You care about Nayuki-kun so much, Raito-san. You have a lot of love to give.

I think you really want to love other people… So it hurts you when you feel like you can’t.

……

The fondness you feel towards your members, the gratefulness you feel towards your fans, the camaraderie you feel towards the people around you… That’s all love.

It’s…all love?

Of course it is. You don’t have to give up on finding someone to spend your life with, because it doesn’t always have to be a partner or a spouse. Friends can do that too.

There are all sorts of different relationships these days! Whenever you feel even a little bit of kindness or consideration towards something, that’s love!

Kindness or consideration…

Haha… I feel that way when I see a dog being taken for a walk. That’s such a broad perspective.

Of course it is! You’re an idol, after all. The more fans you gain, the broader it’ll get!

I see… So if I continue working with Ev3ns…then I might die knowing love…

And that means…I have to talk to Kuguri.

…Yeah.

……

(“Attack on Ev3ns at Concert, Disbandment on the Horizon?” “Kitakata Raito Leaving Ev3ns? Fans in an Outrage”…)

(All of these articles are reporting the same news… But I suppose no new information has surfaced since then.)

*sigh*

(…I acted too impulsively. If that little one had died, the king would have been utterly broken.)

(But to cause despair from an accidental death…)

(Is simply too dull.)

It’s far from the beautiful stage I wanted…

……

Kuguri. I finally found you.

What an uninspiring face… One I’d rather not see. I assume the little one survived.

Have you read the news yet? Everyone despises Ev3ns now. Our idol career is over, all thanks to you.

…Ev3ns will be returning.

Interesting. So? Did you come here to expel me for being a hindrance? I’ll gladly leave.

I didn’t. I’m here to bring you back to us.

Is that so? Are you insane?

I know flattery is your strong suit, but I’d stop, if I were you. I won’t be affected by it.

Just so you’re aware, I have absolutely no intention of giving up. I will continue to break you.

As long as I’m by your side… I’ll break you from both the inside and the outside, slowly and ever-so carefully.

…Do as you wish.

……

I was able to take a step forward after you broke me this time. I’ve embraced the emotions within me that I previously ignored.

So break me as many times as you’d like. Just keep in mind that it won’t be as easy next time.

…Always so unpleasant.

(He recovers every time he gets broken… Just as the little one said.)

Kuguri, there’s something I want to show you. Could you come with me for a moment? You can decide whether you want to come back or not afterwards.

……

Fine. I’ll listen to you just this once.