Representative of Humanity
Phew… Perfect sauna-high… Man, nothin’ beats a good sauna…
Hm?
……
Nagi, what’re you doing on the floor?
……
Hey, I know you’re hot from the sauna, but you’re gonna catch a cold if you don’t get up, brother.
……
At least say someth— Wait, did he pass out?!
Nagi! You good?! Wake up!
Ugh… Buchi…san…
Okay, at least you’re conscious. Was it heat exhaustion?
I presume it is simply a mild case of anemia.
Woah, you scared me. Have you been there this whole time?
Yep.
Then don’t just stand there dual-wieldin’ popsicles. Give the guy a hand…
*munch, munch…*
Y’alright, Nagi? Can you stand?
Can yooouu?
Ah… Yeah.
So what happened? Anemia?
……
Mmmm… Oh, no matter. I wanted to hold out for a just bit longer, but at this point…
You will do.
*pant, pant…*
(It almost feels like I’m getting sleep paralysis…)
Paralyzed, are you? The heat from the sauna threw quite a large wrench into my system.
Even my human mimicry is starting to glitch…
(M-Mimicry…?)
Do you wish to see my true form? I’m right next to you.
*gasp*
Unfortunately, I cannot be captured by your retinas at this moment. I have now become Invisible Netaro.
According to Article 1156 of the Interstellar Constitution, as established by my home planet, any local lifeforms who discover my true form will be granted exclusive knowledge and the opportunity to make a decision.
However, in this case, exceptional measures must be taken in order to guard my life as a public investigator.
(????)
Yowa Netaro is an extraterrestrial lifeform sent from the planet known by Earthlings as “Proxima Centauri b” in order to complete a certain mission.
The mission is highly confidential, thus, despite the clauses laid out in Article 1156, I am unable to inform you of its contents.
My primary duty is to investigate and conduct military-grade reconnaissance on the dominant lifeform of this planet, the genus Homo; however, in the event of an emergency, my life will take priority over the local lifeforms.
(W-What does that mean…?)
In order for me to continue my lifeform functions and human mimicry on this planet, I must import a certain amount of adaptation factors over a fixed interval of time, henceforth…
You will be my donor.
(I don’t know what he’s talking about…)
This is all you must understand.
CONTRACT AGREEMENT
This Agreement is made and entered into by and between Yowa Netaro (hereinafter “Donee”) and Hachinoya Nagi (hereinafter “Donor”).
- The Donor agrees to provide a specified amount of his biological material to the Donee as an adaptation factor upon the Donee’s request.
- The frequency and quantity of the material donated may be modified, provided as such modifications do not result in the Donor’s loss of life.
- The Donor shall not disclose any confidential information received from the Donee to any other life forms, including but not limited to artificial intelligence.
- The Donor agrees to cooperate with the Donee to prevent any confidential information from being disclosed to other life forms, including but not limited to artificial intelligence.
- In the event that the Donor breaches any terms of this Agreement, the Interstellar Court shall have exclusive jurisdiction over any disputes. The Donee has the right to constrain the Donor until a resolution is reached.
The people of your planet will have no qualms with it this way.
(Th-This leaves me with even more questions. My biological material…?)
You may donate anything you would like, as long as it’s something produced by your own body. I would prefer your blood, myself.
!!
In layman’s terms, you agree to be my donor and help me guard my secret. If not, you die.
?!
Local lifeform Nagi, here, I present you with the opportunity to make a decision.
Would you like to enter this agreement? Or would you instead like me to consume you whole right here? Tell me.
…!
Are you about to cry? Are yooooouuuu? Tears are my absolute favorite, right after blood!
……
Will it…hurt?
I am able to create a substance to numb the pain, but only starting from next time!
I won’t die…right?
Oh, you read the agreement! It would be a waste for me to destroy my only source of adaptation material!
Well, I’m so incredibly hungry at the moment that I cannot entirely promise your safety.
……
Okay. I agree.
Yaaaayy!
Even if I die, nobody would care all that much.
And I don’t think it’s very humane to leave you on your own when you’re struggling, even if you are an alien.
Plus, I don’t want Earthlings to have a bad reputation…
Alright. Are you ready?
Wait, right now? Right here? Hold on, wai—
A-Aaaaaahhhh!
Nagi, you listenin’ to me?
Ah…! Sorry.
Are you sure it’s just anemia?
Yeah. I’m okay.
Alright, just have a seat then. You want a popsicle?
Oh, but I already had one…
You can just have mine. What flavor?
Thank you… Um… Pineapple.
Gotcha. Netaro’s already had a shitton of them… Jesus.
*munch munch*
……
Here.
Thank you.
*munch*
(It’s orange…)
Isn’t it delicious, Gii?
*gasp* Uh… Yeah, it is.
Would you want half of my grape-flavored one tooooo?
Mrgm…! *bump*
Woah. What’s up? Whatcha you jumpin’ at me like a grasshopper for?
It’s…nothing. Sorry.
But it’s so delicious…
……